written 4/4/2020

I’m doing a lot of cleaning these days. Like- toothbrush in the tiny places- kinda cleaning. So while I was methodically dusting my knick-knacks I dropped one. My little bone china jewelry holder with a ballet dancer on the lid. I’ve had it as long as I can remember. I was kneeling on the ground so it didn’t drop far. But it was enough to break her arm, her torso, and part of her very delicate tutu. 

As soon as I lost my grip I swore out loud. But when she hit the ground and broke, I didn’t cry or get angry. In fact, my only reaction was to collect the pieces so that I could glue her back together. 

My oldest daughter was really concerned. “Oh no Mom!” she said. But I said to her, and truly meant it, “It’s okay. I’m not sad. I can glue her back together.”

And I did. Her arm and torso fit back into place so you can hardly tell she broke. The tutu, well that’s another story. I collected the tiny fragile pieces, and put them in a little bag to keep, I guess. Before I glued the little ballerina back together I washed her. Not just dusted, but really cleaned her- with a toothbrush. Something I’ve been “too busy” to do for well...a long time. 

She isn’t the same as she was before I dropped her. She can’t be. A little bit of her is missing. But she shines brighter than she has in years. And it made me smile. Because for the first time in almost two years, I felt like there was something clear to write about.

Did you know that when using super glue you have to hold it “firmly” in place for 30 seconds or more? I learned that while holding a teeny tiny bone china arm to a tiny shoulder. Turns out you can hold something delicate firmly together until the glue takes hold.  

This strange time may break us down, it may force us to clean things (maybe parts of ourselves) we haven’t in years. But with a little faith, a steady hand, maybe some super glue, we can put it back together. Not the same. But still good. A little better in some ways.